I first told Mia about The Princess and the Pea about a week ago after we saw a clever broadband advert using the fairy tale. The original (and I think much less interesting version) is a fairy tale written by Hans Christian Andersen in the 1830s.
It's a classic boy meets girl story. Prince looking for nice princess, all he can find are girls interested in his Bentley and Stock Options (well the 1830s equivalent) and he's never quite sure whether they are real princesses or it-girls. One stormy night (must be set in Manchester) a soaking wet girlie ends up at his pad, touting a tale that she is a princess.
Things move fast in royal circles and her prospective mother in law decides to test her out with green veg (yeh weird I know but stay with me). She places a pea under a huggee pile of mattresses and tells likely-princess to get her head down for the night. The next morning the princess complains of a sleepless night, kept awake by something hard in her bed (oo-er). Prince leaps around like a lovesick loon, only a true princess would be sensitive enough to feel a single pea through all those layers. Cue marriage.
Mia's three, she can't actually read but she loves telling us stories while holding the book, except they always have a very special Mia twist. Enjoy the madness, they'll be lots more.
The Princess and the Pea 2010 by Mia Catherine Simpson.
The princess noted all the children and would come of us. She got wet in a stylish place and the stylish place means it’s the castle. She means she’s gone in the rain and she knows she’s already been in the rain.
The woman had a present in her fingers. The fairies came and they didn’t notice there was another princess in the castle. They forgot what they said to each other
The princess couldn’t believe it, she ran all the way home, she got wet cos it was still raining. She heard a little voice crying and screaming. He got all nudey rudey, he loved to get the in the nude.
“What are you doing?” said the princess.
“I’m going to the toilet!” said the prince.
“This is not good,” said the princess. “You can’t go on your own, get out this castle.” And she slammed the door in his face.
“Oww “said the prince, “That’s my toes. I want to go into time out.”
“I’m not your best friend” said the princess.
“I’m not your best friend” said the prince.
“Hmmppffff” said the princess.
She snatched the pink towel off daddy. She chopped it off with peas and cucumber.
“That’s not good” said the woman. “Get out my castle.”
Night night mummy said the princess with the pea in her bed.
“Aww that’s nice, I really love you.”
“Are you alright princess?” said mum
“Yes, I really am.”
Princess and the pea did not believe her mum. She died into tears. She didn’t even know there was a mummy coming over.
“Ah you did it mum, I really love you.”
And then she got married.
The End.
